There is a Hadith in Jame’ Tirmidhi about teachings good manners to children and instructing them in Islamic culture:
Translation: It is narrated on the authority of Hadhrat Jabir bin Samurah (May Allah be well pleased with him) that the Holy Prophet (Sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) said: A man instructing his children in good manners is better than giving 1 Sa’a (a unit of measure) of charity. (Jame’ Tirmidhi, Hadith No. 2078)
People spend money on various beneficial works as a virtue. They participate a lot in charities and donations. Spending 1 Sa’a worth of money is undoubtedly a good deed, but for a father a far better and excellent deed would be to teach good manners to his child and to direct his child’s attention to acquiring good manners.
There is another Hadith in the same regard:
Translation: Hadhrat Ayub bin Moosa (May Allah be well pleased with him) narrates on the authority of his grandfather from his father: The Holy Prophet (Sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) said: No father gave his child a better gift than good manners. (Jame’ Tirmidhi, Hadith No. 2079)
Every parent wants to give his child the best possible gift. They want to make the child happy by giving him/her the best of all things. For this, a parent gives his child valuable, expensive things to his child. All those gifts are things which are helpful in, at most, one phase of life. After a period of time, the gifts given by the parents are not useful anymore. However, there is one gift that is so good that there is no gift better than that. This gift is the instruction in good manners and etiquette, taking good care of the child and proper upbringing of the child. This is the gift that a child can use as provision for his/her whole life.
This instruction in good manners will always be shining through in the day-to-day life of the child and will always be expressed through the child’s character. A good habit once taught by a father to his child slowly becomes ingrained in the child as he/she repeatedly performs that good deed and finally becomes second nature to the child.
What else can be a better gift than something which can be used to good effect for the entire life! There can be no other gift better than something which can be used for the entire life. Other gifts can be used in this material world only for a time, but proper upbringing of a child is that priceless gift that not only is it beneficial in this world but its effects will be seen in the hereafter as well. The parents are given reward on this and the child gets the reward of performing good deeds.
For this reason, the Holy Prophet (Sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) has ordered time and again us to teach proper etiquette to our the children. There is a Hadith:
Translation: You make your children praiseworthy and raise them well. (Sunan Ibn Majah, Hadith No. 3802)
Hadhrat ‘Ali (May Allah be well pleased with him) says:
Translation: Instruct the members of the household in good things and teach manners and etiquette to them. (Jame’ Ul Ahadeeth, Hadith No. 33822)
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Jazakum Allah Khair
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With Kind n Humble Regards,
Mohammed Usman
Jeddah-Saudi Arabia
The Messenger of Allah (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) said,
“When Allah wishes good for someone, He bestows upon him the understanding of the Deen.” [Bukhari]
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