~:C.C.4.U:~ Weekly Jokes

 

 

        Quote du Jour


"A rumor without a leg to stand on will get
around some other way."
-- Anonymous


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"The Boss's Itinerary"

To ensure that you have a good time on your trip to
Australia, your team members have planned and
developed a special itinerary to fill the time during
your leisure hours. Agenda follows:

Day 1: The "10 Deadliest Snakes" Fall Tour. You and
a guest will be escorted through the outback and
provided with the opportunity to handle and examine
each of the world's 10 most deadly snakes.

Day 2: The "Great White Encounter." You and your tour
guide will take a small boat to the Great Barrier
Reef, where you will be able to dive into the
chum-laden water and experience the beauty of the
Great White shark.

Day 3: The Aboriginal "Festival of Spears."  You will
be the honored guest of a small aboriginal village as
they celebrate the subjugation of the aboriginal race
by the white man, with free liquor and a special
weapons exhibition.

Day 4: The "Crocodile Dundee" Petting Zoo. You will
be able to come up-close and personal with the
occasionally harmless salt-water crocodiles of the
Australian coast. Lucky audience members are asked
to participate in a croc wrestling exhibition.

Day 5: "Those Marvelous Morays."  This tour will once
again return you to the beauty of the Great Barrier
Reef, where you will be allowed to hand feed special
finger-shaped sausages to the wild eels of Stubby
Hand Reef.

We hope you will enjoy your trip!

Your loyal employees.


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        Picture du Jour





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        Risque Quote du Jour

"Some of us are becoming the men we wanted
to marry."
-- Glori Steinhem


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"Wedding Night Prayer"

On their wedding night, a young couple
finally retired to their hotel room. After making
her preparations, the bride left the bathroom
to find the bridegroom on his knees in front
of the bed.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"I'm praying for guidance," answered the young
man.

"I'll take care of that," she replied. "You better
pray for endurance."

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